So, just as planned, and still with much difficulty, I managed to hit 203 lbs. on Saturday for a total of 8 lbs. lost so far.

“Just as planned.” Sheesh.

This has been much harder than I thought it would be. Which is funny, given that I’ve lost 100 lbs. before. However, I’m a stress eater and my stress levels have been high lately. Also it’s been a few years now. I readily admit that I forgot some of those weight loss tools I used before.

Why so much stress?

Lately I’ve been pressing a lot of life’s buttons all at once. Let’s change this thing over here, that one over there, and why not do all of that at the same time.

However, I love change when I see some leverage in it. When I catch the vision of a possibility for some positive change that will give me superior results, I need to chase it!

Of course, if you’ve ever done that thing where you press all the buttons on a device with buttons, you know it can wear down the battery. The battery then requires a charge, and this particular battery is known to accept food in place of electricity.

In fact I’d like to claim that I resemble Mr. Fusion a bit. Put some junk in me, that’s fine! Boom, OK, that was a good quick fix. Emotionally, anyway. It’s comforting.

I do have some tools to work on the stress, however I’m making an exchange of stress for growth. So I’m not terribly worried about the stress for now. I have lots of tools for dealing with stress on a day to day basis, I’m healthy overall, I’m told my blood pressure is great, etc.

Reflecting on lessons learned

Here’s what I’ve learned since the last diet update:

• I am virtually hopeless in the presence of donuts. I will mentally shift any and all caloric-intake plans to accommodate donuts. After eating a couple of donuts, I’m thinking, “wow, suddenly I have only 200 calories left for dinner.”
• However, I’m glad I can do that and still hit my weight loss goals. That’s something worth acknowledging, I think. Persistence is paying off.
• Measurement is still hard. It’s not easy to just jump on the scale, when you have every reason to believe you’ll weigh the same—or more!!! See graph above—than you did the day before. But it’s still important.
• Exercise still helps a lot. Even though I can lose weight without moving around much, just by dropping calories from my meal plans, I feel good when I exercise and it helps motivate me to stay on track.
• I do tend to celebrate a little early. This can slow down my progress.
• I did receive some archetypal help when I took a phone call from several inner archetypes recently. They told me:
  • You need to be mind-mapping more (I’ve developed some extensions for this, and it does help)
  • Turn on some relaxing music during the day
  • Overall things are OK and I’m doing well
• I also met with some new-to-me figures of the subconscious and I am really enjoying learning what they stand for. One of them in particular…a long-distance hiker and walker with a wooden walking stick, an older gentleman who is very well conditioned. This one was inspiring and I’m still unpacking that.
  • Overall these new figures seem to represent the figures which are useful to someone who is succeeding at their goals and making good progress. This realization made me very happy inside.

So, my next milestone is going to be 201 lbs. I will aim to hit this milestone by Saturday, June 29.

That’s a big step down, mentally. I can feel the stress and mental resistance already.

Filed in: Anxiety /32/ | Goals /52/ | Fitness /31/ | Intuition /62/ | Dieting /18/ | Control /110/